


One is Better Than Two

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-27
Updated: 2010-04-27
Packaged: 2019-01-19 07:11:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12405549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: When two ghosts fight over Harry Potter in the Great Hall, the last thing anyone expected was Harry to split into two people–a Gryffindor Harry and a Slytherin Harry.





	One is Better Than Two

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

Title: One is Better Than Two  
Author: Bramble Iceweb  
Rating: T  
Summary: When two ghosts fight over Harry Potter in the Great Hall, the last thing anyone expected was Harry to split into two people—a Gryffindor Harry and a Slytherin Harry.

I: Split! 

The day had started out normal enough. With summer rapidly approaching, the students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry prepared for the day. The seventh years were looking forward to their graduation ceremony and finishing their schooling. Harry Potter was no exception. He woke from his peaceful slumber feeling like something big was going to happen. A part of him—the Gryffindor part—passed it off as nerves since there would be another graduation rehearsal, but another part—the Slytherin part—screamed at him to trust his instincts. Uneasy, Harry took a shower to clear his head. The unsettled feeling remained as he got dressed and headed to breakfast with his friends.

“Harry, are you okay?” Hermione asked when, instead of eating, Harry played with his food.

“Yeah, mate, you look a bit peaky,” Ron added before taking a bite of sausage and chewing loudly.

Harry shrugged. “I have a weird feeling,” he admitted. “It seems like something big is going to happen, but I don’t know what.”

Ron and Hermione exchanged looks. “At least it’s not You-Know-Who,” Ron said cheerfully.

Hermione hit him over the head. “You never know!” she exclaimed. “He could just be dormant like he did the first time Harry beat him!”

“He isn’t,” Harry said shortly. “He’s gone for good this time; I made sure of it.”

Gasps around the Great Hall interrupted their conversation. The Golden Trio turned to the center of attention—two unidentified ghosts making a beeline to Harry. Both, though dead, were immaculately dressed. One of the ghosts had his wild brown hair tied in a ponytail. A sword was sheathed at his side and he wore armor. The other ghost seemed to be the exact opposite of the previous one with his long, silky black hair cascading down his back and cold eyes glaring hatefully. They were like the sun and the moon; bright and dark; good and evil. The brunet yelped as he was practically dragged off the bench and the two ghosts began tugging at his arms. His friends tried to reach for him, but were somehow blocked by a silvery barrier. Spells were thrown, only to be deflected and hit unsuspecting students.

“He’s mine, Salazar!” one ghost said. “You need to back off!”

“You’re wrong, Godric,” the other ghost argued. “The hat wanted him in MY house, he has MY ability to speak Parseltongue, and he was made MY heir! You’ve had him long enough; stop being greedy!”

“He was MY heir first,” Godric protested. “Gryffindor is in his blood! I don’t give a badger about him being your heir by magic! If that excuse of an heir hadn’t accidentally transferred his powers to Harry over here, he’d be in Gryffindor with no arguments!”

“Regardless of what my previous heir did, Harry here is still a part of the family now! You can’t deny that he has many Slytherin qualities!”

“Let go of me,” Harry cried. “You’ll rip my arms off!”

“This is for your own good,” the ghosts said in unison.

“I’m perfectly happy with my house!” Harry exclaimed. “Now get off!”

“See?” Godric cried triumphantly. “He doesn’t want to be a Slytherin!”

“Doesn’t matter,” Salazar hissed. “He is still an heir and, therefore, needs to be in my house! As a Pureblood, you should know this!”

“That’s why he remains in my house!” Godric barked. “He’s family, and by _blood_ no less!”

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Ron bellowed. “YOU’RE HURTING HIM!”

The ghosts ignored him as they continued to tug, not worrying as Hermione and the teachers repeatedly tried to take down the barrier.

“He’s MINE!”

“MINE! Get the bloody hell off!”

“MINE! He’s my last heir!”

“That’s surprising, considering what a whore you were when you were alive!”

“Like you’re one to talk! Abigail Weasley, Alexis Potter, Brenda Prewett, Cassandra Thomas, dearest Helga, Elizabeth Mal—”

“Have you taken the time to memorize all of my relationships? How pathetic! That proves that you not only lacked a life, you also lack a death! Go haunt something!”

“I do!” Salazar retorted. “Your bumbling heir Longbottom now thinks his bedroom is possessed.”

Godric glared and tugged, eliciting another cry of pain from Harry. Salazar tugged harder. The tug-o-war continued until a bright light encased Harry. With a final tug, the two ghosts fell. They each gave a noise of triumph as they felt limbs. Two groans captured the ghosts’ attention. They, along with the rest of the Hall, stared in shock as two sets of emerald green eyes stared back.

“What happened?” came the chorus of voices.

“There’s…two of them…” Ron said breathily.

There, on the ground, sat two Harry Potters. The Harry Potter by Godric’s ghost groaned and stood on wobbly knees and stared at his counterpart, gaping in shock. “What the…?”

The Harry Potter by Salazar’s ghost scowled to cover up his shock. “How eloquent,” he sneered, a nasty smirk tugging at his lips. “Idiot Gryffindors.”

The other Harry Potter glared fiercely. “Shut up, you slimy snake!” he yelled.

Slytherin Harry Potter buffed his nails. “Or you’ll do what?” he scoffed.

Gryffindor Harry Potter clenched his fists tightly. “I’ll bash your face in,” he threatened.

“Idiot,” Slytherin Harry snarled. “We’re the same bloody person. Hit me and what do you think will happen to you?”

Ron fainted as Hermione murmured, “Oh, Merlin. A Slytherin Harry…and a Gryffindor Harry…” She turned to the ghosts of Hogwarts’ founders and yelled angrily, “LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID!”

The ghosts stared at the two Harry Potters and pouted. “Oops.”

A/N: Hehe, a fun little project I started a year or so ago. It’s not very long and I was inspired by Harry’s nature of being a Gryffindor with Slytherin tendencies. Then I thought: what if there was an accident to cause Harry to split into two? And…voila! Hope you enjoyed it. Any feedback is nice.


End file.
